Humans often pray and forget what their mouths can do, forget that every ear is listening, that when you direct your longing to the gods, they can take that personally.
This is one splintered read, which is the intention to convey a shattering mind. It took a bit of time for me to get into the many voices, in fact I held off on writing a review because it’s such a strange take on mental illness or spiritual madness (depending on what you chose to call it). The gates are open, and what comes out is disturbing. Ada has been conjured through prayers, a badly wanted child but it isn’t long after her birth that her parent’s know something is wrong. In her first ‘slow years’ of infancy, she was ‘moody, bright, a heaving sun. Violent.’ As she slips into many selves, Ada begins to fade away.
From Nigeria to America, the ‘others’ are always within, taking over. They are her strength, her terror, her power- but where is Ada? Are they guiding and protecting her, or is she hostage to these supernatural spirits? This is genre bending, and a fascinating surrealist exploration of mental illness. Is it all scientific, can it ever be supernatural, beyond our grasp? Reading it was like being enraptured by madness, it’s the sort of strange book I had to take breaks from. I haven’t read anything like it before.
It does often seem there is a blur between science/religion, mental illness/mysticism- I won’t go on about that here, lord knows there are enough books about saints and mystics that explore if it was ‘mental illness’ or truly encounters with god(s). There is a struggle of self, and we don’t hear as much from Ada as we do from her many others, she is there, but she is a diluted self.
This isn’t going to be your average read, based on ‘the authors own personal experiences’ it is a unique unfolding. How do you put to paper the chaos within’ your tornado mind? Though most people believe themselves to be stable beings, there are moments in ever life when solid ground abandons the mind, many moments of identity crisis, luckily for the majority of us these are fleeting moments. What, who am I? In a sense, we all house many selves, but when you can’t differentiate or put forth the core ‘me’, an unraveling occurs.
Which Ada is she? The seductress, the volatile and violent, the fearful? Is she full of gods? Which reality is the most real? The one we live in our minds, or the outside world? An ‘easily bruised child’ that takes all the wounds of her life into adulthood, will she ever be Ada, will she merge with the others and decide to plant both feet in the ‘other-world’, check out of her own? The veil between our world, and the spiritual is a wispy cobweb for Ada.
This is like no book you will ever read, if it were a painting, it would have many faces and you wouldn’t be able to explain it, nor whether you’re looking at a human, monster or god. Some readers will be brain numbed and lost, others will devour it. Curious to see what this author will cook up next.
Publication Date: February 13, 2018